FANFAQ: What is a Parasocial Relationship?

“Parasocial” is everywhere, from TikTok debates to becoming 'Word of the Year.' But the internet’s definition and the real psychological meaning don't always line up.

Last week, Cambridge Dictionary revealed its 2025 Word of the Year — “parasocial.” The dictionary says this year, the word notably transformed from being primarily used in academic spaces to becoming used widespread online.

“Viral celebrity moments like Taylor Swift’s engagement and Al controversies drove huge spikes in lookups of parasocial,” the dictionary noted.

Searches skyrocketed, the word became shorthand for “unhealthy attachment,” and people began throwing it around anytime someone enjoyed a celebrity a little too much for their liking.

At this point, “parasocial” is everywhere…but not always used correctly. Since it’s a term often used to describe passionate fans, Fangirl Forward is here to break down what it really means.

What is a parasocial relationship?

Cambridge Dictionary defines parasocial as “a connection that someone feels between themselves and a famous person they do not know, a character in a book, film, TV series, etc., or an artificial intelligence.”

In simpler terms, a parasocial relationship is a one-sided sense of familiarity or emotional connection with someone you encounter through media. You recognize their face, voice, personality, or story so consistently that your brain begins to file them as someone you can easily recognize, even though you may have never met them in real life.

While we usually talk about parasocial relationships in the context of music artists or actors, they’re also much broader than that. People can form them with fictional characters, athletes, YouTubers, podcasters, news anchors, streamers, and now even AI.

“The language around parasocial phenomena is evolving fast, as technology, society and culture shift and mutate: from celebrities to chatbots, parasocial trends are fascinating for those who are interested in the development of language,” Cambridge Dictionary’s Colin McIntosh said.

You may also hear the term “parasocial interaction,” which describes the momentary feeling of engaging with someone through a screen, such as when a creator looks into the camera or a host asks a question you mentally respond to. Parasocial relationships go a step further. They’re the long-term sense of familiarity or connection that forms over time, even when you’re not actively watching. Most fandom experiences fall firmly into the relationship category, not just interaction.

How do parasocial relationships form?

Parasocial relationships don’t come out of nowhere. They form because of how human psychology works, and how modern media is structured.

“Humans have evolved to thrive in groups, probably because 250,000 years ago you needed to rely on other people to survive by building social relationships,” social scientist and Harvard professor Arthur C. Brooks explained in a Harvard Health article. “And so we become attracted to and care about people if we have a regular enough exposure to them.”

At the most basic level, these relationships start with familiarity. The more often you see someone’s face, hear their voice, or follow the details of their life, the more your brain begins to treat them like a recurring character in your world.

For example, if you watch the news every morning, you may see the same anchors on your screen repeatedly. You may not realize it, but you are building a growing sense of trust in these personalities to tell the news accurately every day. That sense of reliance and trust is a parasocial relationship in action.

The same thing happens on social media. You may follow your favorite music artists or actors on Instagram. Their vacation photos, behind-the-scenes updates, and day-in-the-life videos easily appear right alongside updates from your real-life friends. The lines of your mental “social circle” can naturally blur as a result.

You can also think about sports fans who follow the same athletes and commentators year after year. You learn their stats, their personalities, their backstories, and you develop opinions about their performance or personal lives. You may feel proud when they succeed or frustrated when they struggle. That emotional investment is also a parasocial relationship.

Even in politics, voters often feel connected to public figures they’ve never met — believing in their values, trusting their judgment, and supporting them at the polls based on a sense of familiarity that’s built entirely through public speeches and social media strategies, not any true interaction.

This constant exposure we get from celebrities and media personalities can lead to what psychologists call perceived intimacy. You learn how someone talks, what they’re excited about, how they interact with their friends and the things they care about. You see pictures of their pets, and their childhood photos. You get official announcements when they split from their partner or have a baby. Of course it starts to feel personal, your brain is responding exactly how it’s wired to.

At the same time, many creators and celebrities use intentional strategies to keep you engaged in their lives beyond their work. This may include:

• direct-to-camera storytelling

• personal or emotional anecdotes

• day-in-the-life content or behind-the-scenes footage

• fan-specific language (“besties,” “hey loves,” “I made it this far because of you,” or fandom names like “Swifties”)

• livestreams and Q&As

• easter eggs and interactive clues

Some of this is deliberate brand strategy because the closer fans feel, the more loyal they are to continue driving business. Parasocial relationships can, and often are, monetized. And of course, some of it is also genuine personality and creative expression.

Either way, it shapes how audiences connect and fuels parasocial relationships even further. It’s important to know that no matter how real things may feel, the relationship is still one-sided, and you are never getting the full picture of the person.

What do people get wrong about parasocial relationships?

For a term that’s suddenly everywhere, “parasocial” is also one of the most misunderstood concepts online. The internet often uses it as a catch-all insult — a way to call someone obsessive, delusional, or “cringe” for caring about a public figure. But most of those assumptions don’t reflect what parasocial relationships actually are.

Here are the biggest misconceptions.

1. Parasocial means you think a celebrity is your friend.

A parasocial bond is often mistaken for delusion, as if caring about a public figure automatically means you believe they know you personally. But parasocial relationships are about familiarity, not necessarily the belief that you actually know them.

You can still be parasocial without thinking a musician is texting you, that a Broadway actor knows you exist, or that a creator is secretly your best friend. Again, it simply is a term used to describe your interest in a person that would not be able to recognize you back.

Of course, in some cases, parasocial attachment can tip into confusion or delusional thinking. But that is not the definition of parasocial, nor is it the norm. Parasocial refers to the psychological response of recognition, not a detachment from reality.

2. Parasocial relationships are a modern social media problem.

Since the concept of parasocial relationships is very visible today, thanks to things like TikTok, stan Twitter and streamers, it’s easy to assume that parasocial they’re a Gen Z thing or a byproduct of influencer culture. But parasocial relationships are not a new phenomenon.

The concept dates back to 1956, when sociologists Donald Horton and Richard Wohl noticed that TV viewers often related to on-screen personalities in ways that resembled real-life social bonds, despite the relationship only going one way.

Radio hosts, news anchors, and early Hollywood icons all inspired parasocial attachment decades before the internet.

What has changed is visibility and access. Social media creates the feeling that public figures are always within reach, making parasocial relationships easier to notice and easier to sustain.

3. Parasocial relationships only happen to people who are lonely, “chronically online,” or struggling.

Another common misunderstanding is that parasocial bonds only form when someone lacks social skills or real-life relationships. In reality, people with full social lives, busy schedules, supportive communities and strong friendships still form parasocial attachments all the time.

Parasociality isn’t a sign that something is wrong, it’s simply how our brains respond to people we see regularly through media.

However, it is important to note psychologists say that loneliness and social isolation can make parasocial bonds feel more intense. If someone is going through a difficult period, a parasocial connection might take on a deeper emotional role or fill a temporary gap. But that doesn’t mean parasocial relationships only happen to lonely people, or that loneliness is a prerequisite to forming one.

In fact, Harvard Health emphasizes that parasocial bonds can actually support mental well-being by easing loneliness, offering comfort and giving people a sense of belonging, especially during stressful periods. Parasocial relationships can also lead to real in-person friendships, through fandom communities.

4. Parasocial relationships are automatically bad or unhealthy.

Parasocial relationships are not inherently good or bad. They’re simply a way humans relate to people we see repeatedly through media. Like any relationship, they exist on a spectrum.

They can be comforting, inspiring, educational, entertaining and creatively energizing. Harvard Health notes that parasocial bonds can reduce loneliness, offer emotional companionship, spark motivation, help people feel seen and even lower stigma around mental health when creators share personal stories.

“For example, children might learn lessons about right and wrong from characters they connect with on shows such as Sesame Street or Bluey,” Harvard Health said. “Teens or adults might feel moved to work harder if they’re attached to champion athletes, or do good deeds if they admire selfless leaders.”

Parasocial relationships can also strengthen real-world social connections as people bond over the artists they love, the teams they root for and the fandoms they belong to.

But parasocial relationships can lean negative when they involve overreliance, financial strain, or a loss of perspective about the one-sided nature of the bond, Cleveland Clinic experts said.

Essentially, the issue is not the parasocial relationship itself, but how it influences your personal behavior.

Researchers have classified parasocial relationships into three subcategories: entertainment-social, intense-personal and borderline pathological.

1. Entertainment-Social

   This is the most common and healthiest category. It’s when you enjoy someone’s work, talk about them with friends, react to their content, or follow their storylines. For example, if you enjoy watching Love Island, you may start to develop opinions about the islanders on the show. This could include reacting to their choices, laughing at the drama, or discussing the latest recoupling with friends. It’s simply engaging with the show and its characters the way you would any other piece of entertainment. You know the relationship is one-sided, but its fun, engaging or socially meaningful to you.

2. Intense-Personal

   Things start to intensify here. People in this category may experience “intensive and compulsive” feelings. It goes beyond having a crush or enjoying fun facts, and the attachment can start to interfere with daily life. People in this category typically can fall behind in school or fail to develop a real social life because they are so distracted by their infatuation with the celebrity. They might daydream extensively, refresh social media constantly, or feel convinced that they and the celebrity are destined to connect or be best friends. Going back to our Love Island example, people in this category may go beyond just reacting to what’s on the show. This could include feeling personally upset about their relationship drama, making assumptions about things you haven’t seen, imagining what they’re “really like” off-camera, or believing you and a contestant would be close if you met. The emotions feel powerful, even if the person still comprehends the relationship isn’t real.

3. Borderline-Pathological

   This is when we enter the danger zone. Its exactly what media outlets point to when they say “parasocial relationship gone wrong.” It may include stalking, delusional fantasies, believing the celebrity owes them affection, crossing boundaries, and in the worst cases, violence. Examples cited by researchers include thoughts such as “I would gladly die to save my favorite celebrity” or “If I walked into their house, they’d want to see me.” For Love Island fans, this may look like tracking a contestant’s movements obsessively, sending invasive messages, believing they owe you something, or thinking you’re meant to be in their life. These cases are important to discuss, but they represent a tiny fraction of parasocial experiences and often coexist with broader mental health struggles.

Ultimately, “anything that can be true about a regular social relationship can be true about a parasocial relationship,” Gayle Stever, a professor at SUNY Empire and an expert on parasocial relationships, told National Geographic in 2024. “Are they positive? Can they be good for us? Absolutely. Can they be negative? Can they be toxic for us? We all know examples of that.”

When can a parasocial relationship become unhealthy?

Most parasocial relationships are harmless, comforting, and rooted in curiosity. But like any emotional connection, they can quickly shift into unhealthy territory, especially online.

Psychologists say a parasocial bond may become unhealthy when:

• Your identity becomes overly wrapped up in a celebrity
It’s normal to cheer for your favorite team or feel proud of someone you admire, but when their wins, losses, scandals, or relationships start to feel like they reflect directly on you or your own identity, its a sign things may have gone too far.

• Your mood depends on what the celebrity does
If their breakup ruins your day or their silence feels personal, the emotional stakes may be too high.

• You feel a sense of entitlement
Believing a celebrity owes you access, explanations, or emotional transparency is a sign the boundary has blurred. It’s totally normal to want updates or hope to meet them, but it’s also normal (and healthy) for them to want to go about their day without performing for the public. Demand nothing.

• You sacrifice real-world responsibilities
Skipping work, school, sleep, or other obligations to keep up with a celebrity’s updates or content is a sign you may be too invested.

• You spend money you don’t have
Buying merch, tickets, or subscriptions is totally normal. But going into debt to do those things is not.

• You interpret fan service as personal affection
A like on social media, a smile at a meet-and-greet, or an eye-contact moment doesn’t mean the relationship is mutual. Some artists may recognize longtime fans who go to a bunch of shows or conventions, but that recognition still exists within the context of fandom and is not a sign of any real personal relationship.

• You feel isolated outside the fandom
If you start to struggle maintaining your real relationships because of the amount of energy you’re putting into your parasocial ones, the balance may be off.

It’s important to be mindful of these warning signs because while most fans stay respectful, boundary crossing can affect the real people at the center of the connection. When parasocial feelings intensify, celebrities can face harassment, invasive messages, and intense scrutiny over their personal lives. In more extreme situations, fans may dig into private personal information, demand direct responses, or show up in physical spaces where they shouldn’t be, creating a lack of safety for the celebrity. It’s important to know that maintaining healthy boundaries protects both fans and the public figures they care about.

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Are you too parasocial?

Okay, now for the fun part! We’ve learned what parasocial relationships are, how they form, and where they can go right or wrong. But what about you? Where do you fall? Let’s find out.

1. Do you enjoy keeping up with behind-the-scenes content, interviews, or updates from your favorite artist, creator, or show?
– Yes
– No

2. Do you feel excited when someone you follow announces a new project, season, or update?
– Yes
– No

3. Do you check their social media multiple times a day without really thinking about it or have updates turned on?

– Yes
– No

4. Do you believe your favorite celebrity owes you personal updates about their life?
– Yes
– No

5. Do you feel angry or betrayed when your favorite celebrity dates someone or changes direction in their career?
– Yes
– No

6. Do you ever rearrange major responsibilities (school, work, family obligations) to keep up with their updates or activities?
– Yes
– No

7. Do you feel like you “know” the celebrity on a deeper level than other fans do?
– Yes
– No

8. Do you feel personally hurt or rejected if they don’t interact with your comment, DM, or post?
– Yes
– No

9. Do you spend time speculating or theorizing about a celebrity’s personal life and start treating those assumptions like fact?
– Yes
– No

If you answered “no” to most of these questions, then congratulations! You may be a parasocial fan, but you are not in too deep. Remember, parasocial relationships are about recognition, so most people naturally have them in some way, shape or form. In fact, Cleveland Clinic health experts say, “these days, it’d actually be a little weird if you weren’t,” at least a little parasocial.

The key is making sure they don’t get out of hand. So if you did answer “yes” to more questions than you’d like to admit, particularly those deeper questions (like ones focused on entitlement, emotional dependence, or rearranging responsibilities), it may help to rebalance things a bit.

Here are a few ways you can stay grounded:

• Take a social media break

  I know it’s said all the time, but truly, touching grass is a healthy alternative. Go outside, engage with other people and try to build real relationships to supplement your parasocial ones. Your social media timelines can easily be filled with strangers talking to you through your screen as if you are friends, so it’s easy to feel connected. But taking time away from your phone can help ground you in what’s real.

• Try out other hobbies

  Having a couple parasocial interests may be okay. But fandom shouldn’t be your only hobby or interest. If going to see your favorite artist in concert, seeing Broadway shows, or theorizing about a TV show is your only source of joy or comfort, its a sign you may need to find other things to root your happiness in that are more reliable.

• Ground yourself in real-world relationships

  There’s no need to replace fandom, but make sure you have strong real relationships. Send a text to a friend. FaceTime someone. Sit in a coffee shop and simply exist around other people. I know it can be easier said than done, I spend a lot of time indoors because I work remotely full-time. But human presence fulfills your emotions in a way parasocial relationships can’t replicate.

• Shift from consuming to creating

  Research shows that when fans move from passive consumption to creative expression, such as writing, editing, journaling, photography or launching fan projects, the relationship becomes less dependent on the celebrity and more empowering from within the community. Creating for yourself can turn the relationship into something you control, not something controlling you.

Bonus: If you’re looking to learn more about parasocial relationships, you can also check out this episode from Fan Fave Media’s School of Pop podcast from earlier this year! I chatted with Dr. Lynn Zubernis, a clinical psychologist, university professor and passionate fangirl to break down all things parasocial.

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FANFAQ is a recurring column from Fangirl Forward that demystifies the entertainment industry for fans. Got something you’ve always wondered about? Send us your question here.